Roscoe’s Chicken + Waffles

Fried Chicken and Waffles = Best. Idea. Ever.

I know I’m way behind the curve on this one, but I finally tried Roscoe’s Chicken and Waffles yesterday. There comes a time in every young vegetarian’s life when he has to add a side of fried chicken to his waffle, and the only place to do that is at Roscoe’s. It may have been the most damned delicious thing I’ve eaten in a long time, in the most basic, butter-smothered, drenched in syrup kind of way. You see that huge dollop of butter in that picture? Yeah, that’s for real. Paula Deen would have fit in just fine at Roscoe’s. It’s been so long since I had real butter, that I think my body forgot how good it tasted. Combine that with my first chicken thigh in years, and my digestive system was not as nearly as happy with me as my taste buds were. Even after 4 large enzyme pills, my stomach was still on strike. There are reasons why I don’t eat food like that except once in every few years, and gastrointestinal discomfort is one of those reasons. Also, who knows how many chicken hormones are now coursing through my veins; those pieces of chicken were abnormally large. If I had to put together all those piece to form a full chicken, it probably would have been bigger than most dogs. There can’t be anything good about eating a monster chicken.

I don’t think I’ll make it back to Roscoe’s for a very long time, if ever. My food ethics and digestive incapability don’t allow for it. But I think I have finally decided that I need to get a waffle iron. The waffle part I can definitely do on a regular basis, preferably with some whole grains, pecans, maybe some flax seed. Who wants to come over for brunch some weekend??? (Bellini’s included). I just need to figure out a way to make vegan fried chicken (cue the eye-rolling from anyone reading this). Yes, I realize I’m a tree-hugging, hybrid-driving, health food nut, but I’m pretty sure it’s part of my indelible charm. Also, it’s why I won’t drop dead of a heart attack at 50. Though if I got to eat Roscoe’s every day, dying at 50 might be worth it…

Ciao Bella!

Matteo Yazge

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