How To Make it 25 Years

Aww, look at those kids!
(and not the Facebook box in the corner)

Today is my parent’s 25th Wedding Anniversary. So, first let’s hear it for them for making it this far! Frankly, I’m shocked. I was almost 100% certain that me, Mark, and Alexis’s shenanigans (pulling my sister’s arm out of the socket, holding her upside down over the toilet threatening to “flush” her, etc.) would have put their marriage on thin ice. But lucky for us they come from stronger stock. Today had me thinking about two things in particular. I’m only 2 years away from being how old my dad was when they got married (yikes!). The second thing was that they must have had some secret techniques to make it this long. So in an effort to get my act together before I’m “marryin’ age” I’ve taken a stab at guessing what that secret might be:

  • Develop complementary achy joints/muscle groups
    So my mom’s knee is slowly grinding away, to the point that she had rooster cartilage injected into it. Kind of like when they put oil in the tin man’s joints in Wizard of Oz. My dad has back problems, but continues to insist on lifting heavy things in and out of our garrage. This leads to many an evening on the couch, icing or heat-packing their various maladies. Is there anything more adorable than having some middle-aged invalid time together? Especially when you both enjoy Law and Order so much. Sign me up. Mariska Hargitay, I’ll see you there.
  • 11 Secret Herbs and Spices
    Yes, just like the secret to Kentucky Fried Chicken, there is a recipe for love. It involves ample amounts of hummus and kibbey. My mom figured out really quick that it was probably a good idea to learn how to cook all the food that my dad grew up with (and she makes them really well, btw). Not only would this keep my dad well-fed, as he was still a growing boy at the sprite young age of 25. But I have an itching feeling she thought this might also keep her in-laws away for longer periods of time. I kid, I kid. But there is something to be said for the bond that two people can make over a meal, especially one that they make together. And by “make together” I mean my mom would cook and my dad probably cleaned up. He always was a good sous chef.
  • All You Need is Love
    Honestly, there have been some days when I wonder how my parents even found each other. In many ways they are complete opposites. My dad is far more of a pragmatist, my mom the eternal dreamer – I still just nod my head and laugh whenever she talks about adding on more rooms to their current house. They definitely have different approaches to money, which I quickly learned and used to my advantage as a kid. You have to know which parent to hit up for cash! And perhaps the most significant difference, my mom would go sashimi for sashimi with me at a sushi bar, and my dad is not really a raw fish kind of guy. He’s more of a California roll person. But as different as they can be at times, never have I doubted that they love each other. In fact, I’m convinced it’s the differences that make them fall in love with each other all over again. You know, when my mom asks if she can remodel the kitchen, and my dad gives her that “sure, as soon as we win the lottery” look. That’s love.


Whatever the secret to their success, I do want to congratulate them on 25 years of marital bliss! (If you see them in person today *cough*Alexis*cough*, please give them a hug for me!) But even though I think I’ve figure out their secret to love over the course of this post, I’m still nowhere near ready to get married. To play things safe, I’m going to start using my mom’s age as a benchmark for when I should think about getting hitched instead. Mom was at the ripe age of 31 when they got married. Yes, that’s right. My mom was 31, my dad was 25, and that makes her a cougar. So, maybe that’s the last piece of the equation? 😉


Ciao Bella!

Matteo Yazge


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